Rollercoaster ride

Today felt like an emotional rollercoaster, and if my days continue like this, I fear I might lose my sanity. Just yesterday, I reminded myself not to expect too much because the more you expect, the more disappointment follows. So, I decided to take things as they come. This morning, I received great news—I found out that I could have my two wisdom teeth removed for free! Normally, the procedure costs around 3,000 to 5,000 pesos each, but I wouldn’t have to pay anything. I need those teeth extracted so I can finally get braces, something I’ve wanted ever since my permanent teeth came in. Knowing that I was one step closer to achieving that dream made me incredibly happy. I truly thought that nothing could stand in my way anymore. But I was wrong. Just a few minutes ago, I received a phone call telling me that our petition had been denied *again*—for the second and final time. No more appeals. No more chances. We were left with no choice but to accept it. As I tried to process everything, my husband got frustrated with my silence. He called because he needed someone to talk to, but when he didn’t hear me respond right away, he assumed I wasn’t listening. In truth, I *had* replied—he just didn’t hear me. Then he accused me of not wanting him to come home, which couldn’t be further from the truth. He said he didn’t know what to do, that he felt lost, and that he desperately wanted to see our children because he missed them so much. I told him to take one last job and save up, so we’d have something to start with when he returned home. But instead of considering my suggestion, he dismissed it, saying it was *easy* for me to say since I wasn’t the one separated from our kids. Then he suggested that *I* get a visa, work abroad, and let *him* stay with the children—knowing full well that it wasn’t an option since I never got to finish my studies. He always throws that fact in my face, and it hurts every time. I don’t know what he expects me to say. If I say nothing, he assumes I don’t want him to come home. If I tell him to come home, he says it’s easy for me to say. No matter what I do, I can never say the right thing. Every time he’s depressed, I’m the one who has to absorb all his emotions, yet I have no one to confide in myself. When our petition was denied the first time, I refused to get my hopes up during the appeal, knowing how painful the first rejection was. But even though I tried to prepare myself, hearing it for the second time still hurt just as much. I’m grieving too, but he’ll never know that. Because he only sees *his* pain. He never stops to ask how *I* feel. Instead, he judges me—assuming that I don’t feel anything at all. It’s sad. But then again, life has never been fair.

Journey

It''s a long long journey
Till I know where I''m supposed to be
It''s a long long journey
And I don''t know if I can believe
When shadows fall and block my eyes
I am lost and know that I must hide
It''s a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you

Many days I''ve spent
Drifting on through empty shores
Wondering what''s my purpose
Wondering how to make me strong

I know I will falter I know I will cry
I know you''ll be standing by my side
It''s a long long journey
And I need to be close to you
Sometimes it feels no one understands
I don''t even know why
I do the things I do
When pride builds me up till I can''t see my soul
Will you break down these walls and pull me through?

Cause It''s a long long journey
Till I feel that I am worth the price
You paid for me on calvary
Beneath those stormy skies
When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes
It feel like everything is out to make me lose control
It''s a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you.to you

Reachable?

Does it happen to you? when you feel that your
dreams is in your grab, and then suddenly it
disappeared in your very eyes. Very frustrating
isn't it? It happens to me all the time,when
i thought that i really can have it, it will
vanish, you can feel that it is cm. away from
your hand and justlike a snap! it will gone,
So better not to expect anything to prevent
disappointments, if it happens, it happens.
if not it's not meant to be. You'll be surprise
and before you know it, it's already yours!

When do courtship ends?

When does courtship end? When we're in love, everything feels so beautiful and light. It feels like you can do anything, and for a guy who's courting, he'll do anything just to get the girl’s yes. But once he gets the answer, that's it! In fairness, sometimes even when you're in a relationship, the guy can still be thoughtful and sweet. But when you're married, that's a whole different story. I've spoken to a lot of married people about their lives, and sometimes they talk about their husbands behind their backs (just kidding!). One woman told me that her husband is good, he’s a homebody, doesn't go out or hang with friends, loves the kids, and provides well. But she’s not happy. What? Why is she unhappy? That sounds like an ideal husband, right? Some might say, "If my husband was like that, I wouldn’t need anything else." Yes, he’s good, but she feels unfulfilled. Sure, he's a homebody, but to the point where he won’t even go out on a date with her. He loves his children so much, but sometimes when she invites him out, he’ll want to go back home as soon as he’s outside just to see the kids. The problem is, when a woman becomes a mother, she feels like she's just taken for granted. Before having kids, she was the center of attention, but after, it's all about the children. Sometimes, women need to feel special too. They still need romance in their lives, not just to be seen as "mom" to their kids. Think about it: she takes care of you and the children, but who’s taking care of her?

Never had enough

People can never seem to be satisfied, always searching for something they don’t have. When I was younger, I used to be quick to judge the decisions of people I knew, or even those I didn’t. But as you grow older and experience more in life, you start to understand things better. For example, when a man cheats, people are quick to call him horrible for doing such a thing. But if we look deeper, there’s usually a reason behind it—unless, of course, he’s just a complete idiot. On the other hand, when a woman cheats, people jump to harsh conclusions and criticism. They’ll call her names or judge her character. But let’s be real—how do we know what she’s going through? We’re not in her shoes, and we don’t understand the struggles in her life. Before we judge others, maybe we should try putting ourselves in their position. Who knows? Maybe if we were in their shoes, we’d end up doing something even worse.

This kinda hit me!

Saw this on some site , dont remember where, i kinda like it, wanna share



My husband was an engineer. Since I met him,
he was always an unflappable rock in my life.
I knew he always had his feet firmly planted on the ground,
and it seemed that no matter what else went crazy, he would
be the one constant.


Three years of romance, and two years of marriage later,
I got tired. He was the most unromantic man I know.
He never bought me flowers, he never surprised me,
and nothing changed in our marriage.


After some time, I finally found the courage to tell him
That I wanted to leave him.
He just sat there, speechless. My heart froze...
What kind of man was I married to that
didn't even know what to say to make me stay?
After a while, he spoke, "What can I do to
change your mind?".


"I will stay if you can give me a good
answer to this question," I replied coldly.
"If I asked for a flower that grew on a cliff, and you
knew that getting it for me means certain death,
would you get it for me?". His face grew troubled.


"Can I give you an answer tomorrow
morning?" he asked. Hearing that kind of answer,
my heart died. I knew that I could never be
happy with a man who couldn't even give me
an answer straight away.


The next morning, when I woke up, he was
missing.


In the living room, under a warm glass of
milk, was a note.
My eyes grew misty as I read it...


"Dear, I have my answer.
I will never pick the flower for you if it
meant certain death.


But before you leave, I hope you can give
me a chance to
Give you my reasons....


You will always sit in front of the
computer and type about for the
whole day, but every time you will end up in
tears cause your formatting
will always go all over the place... I need my
fingers, to do the formatting for you,
so your tears will become smiles.
You like to travel, but would always get
lost...
I need my eyes, so that I can bring you to
the nicest places on earth.
Every time you leave the house, you would
always forget your keys... I need my legs, so that I
can run home to open the door for you.


You never knew how to take care of
yourself... I am always there
for you when you need me most.
I need my hands to help you get rid of the
pesky white hair
You hate so much when you grow old,
to trim your nails, to feed you.


So you see, that's why I can't pick the
flower for you.


Until I find someone who loves you more
than I do, I will need to
have an able body to take care of you.


If you accept my reasons, then open the
door, where I will be
waiting with your favorite muffin."


With tears streaming from my eyes, I opened
the door, and there he stood, with an extremely
worried look on his face.
He still had nothing to say, but just stood
there waving the
packet he had in his hand in front of me.
And then I knew for a fact that I will
never find another man who
will ever love me as much as he does.



Just because someone doesn't love you the
way you want them to
doesn't mean that they don't love you with
all they have...

What's been missing?

Missing? maybe lack of something, attention? the usual ksp thing, sometimes u urself cud not understand, just the loneliness inside you keeps growing and tearing you apart, and really affects your life and ur relationship, and before you know it, youre lost! and havent find your old feelings toward him

Lifeless life

It’s 3:31 in the morning, and I’m still awake. This is how my days usually go—pretty dull, don’t you think? But should I really get emotional right now? Maybe not yet… maybe later. You’re probably wondering, *Does this person even have friends?* Of course, I do! But they’re far away, and honestly, I don’t even know if they still remember me. *Sigh.* Life feels so full of emptiness sometimes. There are moments when you can’t quite figure out what’s missing, but you just *know* that something is. It’s that unsettling feeling of longing for *something*—something you can’t quite define. Is it love? Am I longing for love? But how could that be? I’m in a relationship. And yet… why does it feel like something is still missing? Have you ever felt that way? It’s not that you don’t love the person you’re with, but deep inside, there’s this void—this *something* you can’t quite put into words. What is it? I wish I knew.

A little bit of me

Hey everyone, I’m just your typical person with nothing productive to do—just spending my time in front of the computer. Maybe this is the only place where I can truly express everything I want to say. These days, it’s hard to trust anyone. Sometimes, confiding in someone only leads to more trouble. But here I am, pouring my thoughts into this blog. Why? I guess because, in the end, you don’t know me, and I don’t know you. So really, what’s the harm?