Last year i've found out that my husband was going gaga over some 17 year old girl, to the point that he was spending money for some magic spells and witch craft for the girl to like him too, I was so hurt, betrayed, disgusted and sad at the same time. I wonder how could he do that? while he was always telling me he had no money to give me and our four children, then i will find out that he was spending money for that crap! how pathetic!, when i confronted him, he didn't admit, and ask the person who told me that if ever I ask that person about that, don't ever admit, but the person told my husband that she already told me everything and she doesnt want to continue that spells, Do you know what hurt the most? he told me that he only did that because the girl was rich and he wanted to lend money, bullshit! what a lie, and he was only doing that thiking our future, how bullshit that can be, I forgive him , when he said that he would stop.

three months after, I found out that he has a son to another woman, eight months younger to my eldest son, I felt so devastated, I can't accept, I almost gone crazy, but in the end I forgive him, because theres nothing for me to do but to accept.

A year after, I notice that he was so eager to talk to his sister, and when he wasnt able to talk to his sister, he was mad and throw his anger to me, one day i can't help but wonder what is it that they are talking about? why he was so work up when he wasnt able to talk to his sister, I 've found out the details about what happened a year ago,

the 17 yrs old girl accourding to my sister in law, and she said it was based on what her brother told her, shows motive to my husband that she likes him, then my husband so full of crap falls in love with her, he even cooked for her, and one day because of the advise of the woman who was doing the magic spells he hug the girl and someone see them and told the girls mother what he did, they got mad at him, and because my husband was under the agency the girls mother own, my husband was fired. till then my husband wasnt able to get a nice job, and me including my children suffer, sometimes my husband will say that he left the agency because he doesnt want me to think about what happened, in other words he again use me as an excuse, (really adding insult to injury) go back to what my sister in law and my husband talking about, my husband always talks about how mad he is, and i think hurt because that girl has boyfriend, and treated him like he had some kind of disease, it hurts me to know that he was jealous and wanted to lessen it by talking to his sister and he gets mad at me when he can't talk to his sister.

BTW my husband was planning to file a divorce because according to him that was the only thing he can do to have legal papers, at first i didnt agree, but he told me i was being selfish, and self centered, i have no choice but to agree, he even told me that the lawyer said that the possible grounds must because i have a third party and the custody of the children should be given to him, he told me that it was just a phony, but i can't accept that.

I feel so wrench right now, i dont know what to do, and to think, yesterday i found out that my dad has cancer and needed big amount of money for the treatment, im the eldest but I can't do anything, I felt that the world is crashing right in front of me, and all i can do is to wait for my last breath.